Thing’s you find in school bags but would rather not.

Thing’s you find in school bags but would rather not.

They have only been back a few weeks. The brightness of the new uniform is still shining, the white socks are still white and the trousers still have knees in them. But for how long? Fresh from the summer holidays, we are armed with swanky new bags to complement the new uniforms and I have just made the big mistake of actually taking a look inside them. Thing’s you find in school bags.

Thing’s you find in school bags

You would think that I would have learned by now. Schoolbag housekeeping needs to be completed regularly. So, why do I find myself in the third week back, only just checking the inside contents of the three kids bags? That is almost half a term. Schoolboy (pun intended) error on my behalf.

Well, actually it was only two bags. The eldest is way too cool to be taking something practical to school, like a rucksack. So I ventured inside the pockets of his blazer.

Of course, there are the inevitable items, a party invitation to attend a birthday bash last weekend. A request for a ‘voluntary contribution’ for a school outing or perhaps a slightly outdated-school newsletter. But that would make for a boring read. This post is a no holes barred adventure into the unknown. 

Like many families I’m sure, we keep bags, coats and shoes in a very unorganized manner close to the front door. This gives easy access in the morning rush and almost guarantees that they each have the required items needed at school. 

What on earth is that smell

The reason that I find myself writing this post is down to the fact that over the last few days, I have noticed an ‘odd’ smell lurking as I entered the house. 

Following a few minutes of searching, I narrowed it down to the front door area of our hallway. Coincidentally, the same area as some bags, shoes and coats found themselves, unceremoniously dumped in a pile. Also, the same general location as a couple of blazers and two ties were hung on the bannister. 

All of this could only mean one thing! I was left with no other option but to explore.

I should now mention, I am fully vaccinated. Not just for COVID-19, that will do me no favours in this instance. However, and more importantly. My TB jab is fully up to date. 

Thing’s you find in school bags, but would rather not.

The following is a list of 15 things you would rather not find in the kid’s school bags. Guilty parties will remain anonymous and it is in no particular order. 

  1. A lunch/ID card belonging to a non-family member

    Thing’s you find in school bags
    Photo by Christopher Bill on Unsplash
  2. Two broken pairs of compasses
  3. A condom (alleging to belong to a friend)
  4. Two ‘squished’ satsumas from a breaktime snack
  5. A half-chewed and leaking biro
  6. Chewed chewing gum
  7. Last week’s swimming kit
  8. A random, non-family member sock (note the singular, someone, somewhere is wandering around with only one sock)
  9. An empty vape juice container (allegedly belonging to a friend)
  10. Half a banana
  11. 4 tennis ball-sized rocks
  12. Several used lateral flow tests and swabs (not carefully placed in the little clear bags provided)

    Thing's you find in school bags, but would rather not
    Photo by Reproductive Health Supplies Coalition on Unsplash
  13. A tissue with unknown contents
  14. A half-eaten samosa
  15. A catapult

In conclusion

You can take from this list what you want. I wasn’t particularly shocked by any of it. Questions have been raised to certain members of the house and all responses duly noted. 

The main thing that I have taken from this list is; 

  • Check bags/pockets more frequently.
  • Where the smell was coming from. 
  • It could have been worse.



You can also follow the funny me over on Twitter, or if you are on Facebook, don’t forget to give my page a like and if you want to see pictures of me having my nails painted, then Instagram is the place to be!

Featured Photo by Antonino Visalli on Unsplash



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