Keeping up with everyone
Chatting with another Dad this morning on the school run, it became clear that we all seem to be obsessed with having an even level of life. We obsess about how our lives are at either one end of the spectrum of craziness or the other.
On the seesaw of life we never seem to find that perfect balance.
We are either really busy or have nothing to do. We are either working too hard or struggling to fill our time. The kids are either manic or too lazy. Our thoughts are either up or down. The weather is either too hot or too cold.
We fight with our lives to find that perfect equilibrium. But does such a thing exist? Does anyone have that perfect life?
Kids do? Well, kids do from an adult perspective. But switch profiles and from their eyes, perhaps they
don’t. Their priorities and agendas are different to ours. However, they probably want for more.
As parents we are very good at covering up the cracks. We have adapted and evolved to appear to have it together. Do we do this for appearance or our own sanity? For me, it is a way to protect my children. If I ‘have it together’, they can concentrate on being kids and have the confidence and strength to remain young and be themselves.
Some people often believe that certain celebrities have the dream life. They want for nothing, Deep down we know that isn’t true. The have their struggles. ‘Money doesn’t buy happiness’ after all.
As I arrived home and made myself a cup of tea. It dawned on me. I realised one person that is actually living the best life he could. He had finally found happiness. There was a purpose to getting up and a reason to get dressed.
Who is this mythical person that I speak of?
I have spoken about my Dad’s health issues a few times. Mainly about how it has affected those close to him.
Living with Alzeimers is horrific for everyone affected. My mum cared for my Dad at home for many years. In hindsight, probably more than we admit to. A few years back we made the heart wrenching decision that full time care would be better for Dad and Mum.
I look back now and I honestly can’t remember my Dad being happier. He is allowed to live his life as he pleases. No more restraints of living away from the specialist care home. He no longer gets confused about modern things that used to confuse his world. No more thinking one thing, but finding himself somewhere else.
He can finally life in a bubble. Believing everything and be happy in his own (nieve) world. He has finally found the perfect middle ground.
What’s wrong with ups and downs? That is all part of life. Why do we leave it until the control is taken away from us, to actually live life and enjoy?
We should learn to embrace everything, rather than be scared of extreme moments on the seesaw we call life.